Recent News ! Latest news and headlines from : The Daily Mash - URL :
  A DOG-OWNING couple are up in arms about democracy and freedom of movement after hearing that pet passport rules may change.
  A WOMAN has reached a major milestone in her life after purchasing a box of bran flakes instead of a childish breakfast cereal containing a toy.
  A MUM has requested that everybody f**k off when asked what she would like for Christmas.
  NOT got enough on your entirely self-imposed Christmas to-do list? Here’s how to make December as pointlessly exhausting as possible.
  DO you secretly suspect that celebrities are better people than you? You are correct. Here’s how to destroy your self-esteem by comparing yourself to them.
  IT’S coming up to Christmas, which means some tosser will make you sit next to them to watch a Christmas movie they love and you don’t. Like these.
  WITH Christmas fast approaching, you’ll be spending a frightening amount of time and money in the supermarket. But what should you definitely...
  CHILDREN are being taken to see a Santa behind a plastic screen with masked elves and mandatory hand gel to keep the magic of...
  IT'S been almost a week since right-wing darling Laurence Fox was in the news for hosting a large gathering. With the oxygen of publicity running...
  UK negotiators have denied trying to scupper Brexit talks by discussing the rights of every single fish in British waters.
  IT wasn’t a slip of the tongue. You can take America, France and Germany and stick them up your arse. Britain is the best country in the world and my ...
  ARE you confused by people talking about things that could either be a haircut that would never suit you or a sex position you would never be able to make work? Here...
  DO you find that things you read in the ‘mainstream media’ don't fit with your insane beliefs? Here’s how to convince yourself social media is more...
  IDIOTS have been warned that merely ordering a vaccine does not make them immediately immune to Covid.
  SICK of the government and media being so London-centric? You might have a valid point, or it’s possible you simply live in Wigan.
  TODAY is being dubbed Wild Wednesday because everyone in England is once again thronging the shops proving that we have learned nothing.
  BITTER that you dicked around at the School of Hard Knocks and have no formal qualifications? Order the University of Life’s new prospectus.
  THE only benefit Britain will realise from Brexit is that 16 million people can enjoy saying ‘Told you so,’ experts have confirmed.
  A PINT of Guinness counts as a substantial meal in and of itself, the government has confirmed.
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