Recent News ! Latest news and headlines from : The Daily Mash - URL :
  IT’S happened. In the pressure of the moment in a restaurant you panicked and made the wrong choice. Here’s how to accept it and move on.
  A MAN has warned against any return to the decade from which he benefited enormously.
  WOULD you like to win a date with the UK’s popular home secretary Priti Patel? Enter our unique competition for charity by answering these Priti-related questions. 
  MIDDLE-AGED? Do you sometimes notice that life is less weird than when you were growing up? What happened to these things?
  THE UK is slowly waking up to the fact that, in the face of an oncoming world catastrophe, it has chosen to put a d*ckhead in charge.
  EVER included the phrase ‘as per my previous email’ to suggest the person you’re writing to is as thick as mince?
  CHLORINATED chicken has protested at its demonising by the UK media, insisting there is no shame in being clean.
  TORY MP James Grundy has apologised for exposing his penis in the Ram’s Head pub in Lowton in 2007, but when is the right time to whip out the chinos cobra?
  THE coronavirus pandemic is imminent, but anyone who’s seen any movie or TV show about surviving deadly infections will be fine.
  HOLLYWOOD has pronounced itself free of all abuses of power after the only man who ever abused his power was jailed.
  BLUE passports are back, we’re a sovereign nation again and it’s time to celebrate a patriotic post-Brexit pancake day with British toppings.
  A WOMAN has made her mornings more streamlined and productive by snorting a fat line off the mirror.
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